


Capturing Memories (Coyote Starrk)

by TheRainRogue



Category: Bleach
Genre: Angst, Comedy, One Shot, Other, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:07:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24417139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRainRogue/pseuds/TheRainRogue
Summary: When the Aizen Army incident first began, you didn’t think much of it. You didn’t think about the Espada – who they were or where they came from. You just knew that you had to stop them. To you, at that time, they were mere enemies that had to be stopped. You never once stopped to think of the reason behind why they were following Aizen. To be honest, it didn’t really matter to you. You had never cared about your enemies before, so why bother doing it now? It was foolish. Of course, for those who already knew Aizen, Gin, and Tousen, it was difficult for them, but no one was familiar with the Espada. And you were no exception.
Relationships: Coyote Starrk/Reader
Kudos: 16
Collections: Anime, One Shots





	Capturing Memories (Coyote Starrk)

  * **Genre** : Angst, Romance, Comedy ☁
  * **Word Count** : 7,363 ☁
  * **Pairing** : Reader x Starrk ☁
  * **World** : Anime, Bleach ☁



* * *

When the Aizen Army incident first began, you didn’t think much of it. You didn’t think about the Espada – who they were or where they came from. You just knew that you had to stop them. To you, at that time, they were mere enemies that had to be stopped. You never once stopped to think of the reason behind _why_ they were following Aizen. To be honest, it didn’t really matter to you. You had never cared about your enemies before, so why bother doing it now? It was foolish. Of course, for those who already knew Aizen, Gin, and Tousen, it was difficult for them, but no one was familiar with the Espada. And you were no exception.

You stood atop one of the buildings in Karakura Town, staying alert for any Espada level hollows that decided to appear. While everyone else was busy, this was your job and the reason for you being appointed this job was simple; you were more sensitive to Reiatsu than the others, and you were able to feel it farther away and pick it up a lot quicker than the others could. It was a really handy skill that you were thankful to be born with.

That being said, you caught wind of a spiritual pressure that did not belong to a soul reaper or a human. You knew that it was an Espada, but it was very faint. Whoever it was, they were damn good at hiding their reiatsu, but you could still track it.

Jumping from building to building, you found yourself outside of town in a fairly large forest. The reiatsu was coming from deep within and you knew it was risky to be going in alone, but if you wasted time contacting the others, you might lose it. If worse came to worse, the others would feel your reiatsu when you began fighting. Your job was to stop him from getting away, and that’s exactly what you planned to do.

When you got to the clearing, you hid behind a tree to see if it was anyone you had seen before. Ulquiorra, Yammy, and Grimmjow were the only ones that you had met, and this new Espada was not one of them. He was tall and skinny, with dark brown hair that fell to his shoulders in small waves. He wore the typical Espada uniform, but it was tailored to the way he liked it, as all of them were. He seemed too relaxed to be in enemy territory, though. He was laying back against a tree, his arms behind his head and eyes closed. He didn’t seem too threatening. Then again, neither did Yachiru, and everyone knew how terrifying her power could be.

“How long do you plan to hide, soul reaper?” He asked without opening his eyes.

You scowled at him, coming from around the tree and into the clearing. As you got closer, you noticed a little girl with him, sitting against the tree to his left. She was short, maybe Hitsugaya’s height, with blonde hair. One of her eyes was covered by her mask, but the other was pink in color. “Who are you? And why are you in the world of the living? Did Aizen send you?”

At first, neither of them said anything, and you thought they might not answer, but after a few silent moments passed by, the male opened his eyes – revealing them to be a beautiful shade of blue – and stared at you lazily like he had no interest in the conversation.

“Aizen-sama sent us here.”

“To do what?”

The girl leaned forward, narrowing her eye at the male beside her. “He sent us here for recon, but Starrk is too lazy!”

“It’s a troublesome job.” The male yawned, closing his eyes again. “He should have sent someone else.”

“But he sent _us_!” She scowled before looking up at you, her expression anything but friendly. “You lookin’ for a fight?”

“Lilinette,” the male scolded, opening his eyes again to send her a pointed look. “Don’t make me fight a pointless fight.”

“Stop being lazy!” She yelled, jumping up and pointing an accusing finger at him.

As the two argued, you couldn’t help but stare at the male Espada. He seemed… _different_ from the others you had met. You really couldn’t explain it, but there was an air around him… you couldn’t place what it was, though. There was no doubt that he was powerful, but there was something else. It was… it was…

“Loneliness,” you muttered to yourself.

He heard me, though, turning his eyes back to me. “What?”

“Um…” Had you dug your own grave? Probably. Did you continue digging? Of course. “You seem… lonely.” you furrowed your brow as you analyzed him. You could feel it in your gut. This guy was different, in a good way. He wasn’t emotionless, like Ulquiorra, or stupid like Yammy. And he wasn’t blood-thirsty like Grimmjow. To be honest, it seemed like he wanted no part in this. So why would he be following Aizen? It made no sense.

Something flickered through his eyes, but it was gone as fast as it came. Lilinette snapped her attention to you, huffing and walking over. She stopped right in front of me, her eye filled with anger. “What do you know about him, huh?! You don’t know anything, so don’t act like you do!”

“I didn’t mean it that way,” you muttered, staring down at her; she reached just above your stomach. “That’s just… that’s what it feels like when I look at ’em…”

“Then maybe you should stop lookin’ at him!”

“Lilinette.” He sighed, resting a gloved hand to his forehead. “Stop it.”

“But she – !”

“ _Enough_ , Lilinette.” His voice was stern, but his eyes betrayed him. They looked just as lonely as his aura had indicated, and they were holding pain.

You felt bad for him and you wanted to know more. You knew you were getting in over your head, but you wanted to know more about him, you _had_ to know more. “Um…” the pair looked at you and you smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of your head. “Can I have your names?” You had heard them say their names, but you wanted to hear it from them and get their _full_ name.

“What for?” Lilinette snapped, crossing her arms and glaring at you.

“Curiosity.”

“Curiosity killed the cat.” She stuck her tongue out at you childishly, as if she had just won the fight you weren’t even having.

You grinned. “Good thing I’m not a cat, huh?”

Her eye twitched, a tic mark appearing on her head. “Yeah – ! Well – !” You laughed as she sighed in defeat, hanging her head. “Fine! You win! My name’s Lilinette Gingerback,”

“Y/N, nice to meet you, Lilinette.”

She humph-ed, looking over at Stark expectantly, but he wasn’t paying attention. A big red tic mark appeared on the back of her head and she walked over, kicking him hard in between the legs.

He fell forward, clutching his private area with a strangled groan. “I told you… to stop… doing that…!”

She simply humph-ed in return, turning her back to him. “You should have been listening! What if she would have killed me while you were daydreaming, huh?!”

You winced, slowly approaching the fallen Espada and resting a hand on his shoulder. “You gonna be alright? She looked like she got you pretty good…”

“I always do!” She grinned proudly.

“That’s not something to be proud of,” you muttered under your breath, kneeling down next to him.

After a couple more minutes, he fell back onto the grass, his blue eyes closed and his arm covering them even though he was under the shade of the tree. “Coyote Starrk.”

“What?” you blinked at him.

“His name, idiot, his name!”

“Oh… right,”

Stark looked over at you, moving his arm up to his forehead. “Do you plan to kill us? Or take us to Soul Society?”

You stared at the lush green grass below you, watching as it rustled in the wind. When you had first arrived at the clearing, it was your full intention to bring him to Soul Society or kill him if he resisted. But now… you just didn’t know. If you let him go, would that count as a betrayal to Soul Society? _‘I mean, it’s not like I’m letting Aizen go. This guy seemed harmless enough, and he hasn’t done anything wrong to my knowledge. It wouldn’t hurt… right?’_

“Well?!” Lilinette screamed, the sound louder since she had moved closer in what you assumed to be anticipation. She obviously wasn’t a very patient Espada. Wait… was she even an Espada?

You let out a sigh, turning your gaze up to the baby blue sky, trying to ignore the bickering of your heart and mind. “No,”

“Eh?” She blinked, a look of both confusion and surprise on her face.

“I won’t try to kill you. And I have no intention of trying to take you in.” You closed your eyes, the decision made. Your heart was cheering, while your mind simply sighed in defeat. It was always like this. They’d battle, but only one could win. They never agreed on anything, so you couldn’t have it both ways. It was one or the other, and both were fully capable of screwing you over.

“Seriously?” She blinked again. “Then why are you here?”

“That was my intention… at first.”

“What changed it?”

“I wish I could answer that,” you muttered, scowling at the ground. Even you didn’t understand it.

“Well, since you’re here, you can make yourself useful!” She pointed her finger at you, a grin on your lips. You merely blinked, wondering just what she meant by that.

“Lilinette,” Starrk called in a warning tone, but he was ignored by the smaller hollow.

“Since we’re here, I wanna try some human food! Go get me some!”

Your eye twitched. _‘This kid was sure demanding, wasn’t she? Wait a second…’_ “Since when can Hollows eat human food?” you raised a brow, cocking your head to the side.

“We can still eat stuff like that.” She sent you an offended look, re-crossing her arms. “We just choose not to. Gin-sama has always offered us food, but it didn’t look right,”

You smiled wearily, scratching your cheek as you looked away from her. You remembered Gin’s cooking all too well from before he betrayed the Soul Society. He would always try to cook for you and Matsumoto, but the food he made was far from edible. You always had a routine for that situation, something the two of you called _Dash and Break_. While Matsumoto distracted the silver-haired male, you’d grab the food and sneak out, feeding it to the wonderful plants. And Gin always wondered why they died…

You shook your head, trying to rid yourself of the memory. _‘Stupid Gin. He hurt so many people when he left.’_ You failed to notice Starrk staring intently at you, but you didn’t miss his voice. That voice of his could cut through even the deepest of your thoughts.

“Don’t bother her if she doesn’t want to go, Lilinette.”

“But I want to try _real_ human food!”

“Why bother?” He sighed, closing his eyes. “You probably won’t get it again. It’s too troublesome,”

“She doesn’t mind, right N/N?”

“N/N?” your eyebrow twitched. The hell had she managed to come up with the _exact_ same nickname that Ikkaku used just to annoy you?

“And don’t go giving people nicknames without their permission.” He scolded again. Honestly, he was acting more like her parent.

“You’re so mean, Starrk! _Don’t do this, don’t do that_! That’s all you ever say!” She cried, fists clenched at her sides.

With a sigh, you stood up and readjusted your zanpakuto at your side. “What do you want?”

She blinked up at you before registering what you meant. “You mean you’re going?!”

You shrugged, looking away. “Got nothin’ better to do. _Though I’m supposed to be patrolling…_ ”

“Great! I don’t know the difference, so just get me whatever, kay?!”

You sighed again, shaking your head and walking away. You could faintly make out Starrk scolding her again, but you didn’t catch what about. A smile made its way onto your lips. You had only known those two for, hell, less than thirty minutes, and already you felt close to them. This was a dangerous feeling, you knew it was, but you couldn’t bear the thought of giving up Starrk. You felt drawn to him, as cliche as that was. But that’s what love is, right? One big cliche.

Hold it…

You froze in the middle of the street, feeling a sense of dread wash over your mind. _‘Did I… just say love?? I_ _haven’t even known him for an hour and I’m talking about love. What the hell is wrong with me?!’_

You shook your head frantically, kneeling down and clutching your hair between your fingers. You had never been much of an expert when it came to affairs of the heart, more specifically _love_. You had never thought much of it and often scoffed at the idea of being in love with someone. And love at first sight? That was about as bad as werewolves and imprinting. _‘I mean, seriously, how hard is it to believe that you can fall in love with a single look? This isn’t a fairy tale!’_

“Ugghh! What have I gotten myself into?”

“I don’t know, but it must be pretty bad if you’re talking to yourself.”

You let out a small yelp, jumping up and taking on a strange stance, similar to the one Renji had performed when his Zabimaru turned into a broom. Matsumoto stood there, her head cocked to the side and a curious look on her face. “R-Rangiku!”

She blinked. “Are you okay, Y/N-chan?”

“Y-Yeah. I-I’m fine.” you cleared your throat awkwardly, looking away and fixing your clothes.

Matsumoto stared at you for a minute before a knowing look crossed her face, her lips curled up into a grin. “Y/N-chan is having boy problems~!” She sang. “I can’t believe little Y/N is having a problem with a boy! You’re finally growing up!”

Your eye twitched, a tic mark appearing just below your eye. So what if you never went hunting for guys? You were far more focused on yourself than trying to find a man.

“So tell me, who is it?”

“No one! I’m not having a boy problem!” you cried, but the dust of red on your cheeks gave away the lie, despite how hard you tried to conceal it. Matsumoto had radar for these kinds of things.

“Renji?”

“No way!”

“Ichigo?”

“Matsumoto…”

“Ooo, is it Hitsugaya-taichou?!”

“Never!”

“That’s cold, Y/N-chan~” She whined, a pout on her lips.

“Matsumoto!” you groaned, walking away from her. “I’m telling you, it’s not a guy!”

“Someone I don’t know, then.” She confirmed, following after you with a hand to her chin. She clearly wasn’t letting this go, like she ever did to begin with. “I’ve never seen you hang out with anyone I don’t know. Someone at school? A new friend, maybe?” She grinned in a cat like manner. “Ohh~? Love at first sight, perhaps~?”

“Love at first sight does not exist! It’s just bullcrap that people made up to explain lust for someone’s body!” **Freeze**. _‘Did that mean I was lusting for him? Had I mistaken this feeling for love, when really it was just my hormones going to work? Ugh!’_ You were over-thinking this way too much. You shook your head again and continued walking, ignoring the questioning look from Matsumoto.

She followed after you silently at first, her hands behind her back as she leaned her body only slightly backward as she walked. Her eyes stayed trained on you as if searching for any little indication to solve the mystery, but you gave her none. What would happen if she found out who it was? _What_ it was? Would she call you a traitor? Report you to her captain and then Soul Society?

She must have seen the worried look because she caught up to you, her hand lying gently on your shoulder, her voice matching. “You can tell me. I promise it’ll stay between us,”

“If… If something is forbidden -” you paused, swallowing hard. ” – does that mean it’s wrong?”

“Hmm?” She put an index finger to her chin, looking up at the sky. “That’s a good question. Depends on what it is, I guess.”

“Love?”

She blinked, staring at you for a minute. Things seemed to click in her head and she sent you a soft, knowing smile. “You fell for the enemy, didn’t you?” You stayed silent. How could you possibly admit that? It sounded so wrong out in the open like you had just murdered a million people. “Who is it?”

“His name is Starfk,” you answered softly, staring up at the darkening sky as you remembered the male. “He’s an Espada, part of Aizen’s Army.” you paused. “Does that make me a horrible person? I mean, maybe it’s in my head. I don’t even know the guy!”

Matsumoto smiled, wrapping her arms tight around your shoulders from the side and resting her cheek against your own, much like a mother would do to a child. You had always believed that Matsumoto would make a good mother. Aside from the drinking, anyway. “It’s not in your head. Your eyes are screaming your feelings. I can tell, your heart has already linked with his. It’s too late to pull out now.” She tightened her grip and lowered her voice, just above a whisper. “It doesn’t make you a horrible person, Y/N-chan. We can’t help who we fall in love with. I, too, am in love with the enemy.”

“That doesn’t count, Matsu!” you complained with a frown. “You fell for him _before_ he was a traitor!”

“Not quite,” She shook her head with a sad chuckle. “He was a traitor from the very beginning. I just didn’t realize it.”

“We were all fooled.”

She nodded, releasing you and slapping your shoulder hard. “I say go for it!”

You scowled, rubbing your stinging shoulder. Was that _really_ necessary? For her, you guessed it was.

* * *

When you returned with the bag of store-bought food, you found the two hollows in the same place as before. You had vaguely wondered on the way back if they would even be there when you returned, figuring they used the food as an excuse to get away without a problem, but you were happy to find that they were still there. The thought that maybe they trusted you also made you feel happy.

But it may not even be that. They may just be that confident that they can kill you which, depending on what number Starrk is, he probably could.

When you entered the clearing, Lilinette’s head snapped up before her eye narrowed and she stalked over to you, resting her hands on her hips. “It took you long enough! I was beginning to think you ditched us!”

“Sorry. I ran into a friend on the way and we got to talking.” you held the bag out to her and she ripped it from your hands, returning to Starrk’s side before taking every item out and inspecting it with a sparkling eye. “It’s not much, just some junk food from the convenience store,”

Lilinette had settled for a bag of potato chips, but she seemed to be struggling to open it. Finally, she got so angry she ripped the bag into bits, scattering the salty treat all over herself, the laying Starrk, and the grass. Starrk opened his eyes to glare at her but, like earlier, she simply ignored him, reaching out to grab a chip that had landed on his stomach. She popped it into her mouth and began to chew. When she swallowed, her eye lit up again and she reached for more. “You have to try these, Starrk!”

He grunted in response, not making any movement indicating that he planned to do that.

Lilinette scowled at this. “We probably won’t get another chance! You said so yourself! So try it!”

You watched as the pair argued back and forth. It was amazing, seeing the way they reacted to one another. It was like they were brother and sister, the bond between them was clear as day. You bit your lip to stop from laughing when Lilinette tried to force him to eat the chips, at which they started to argue again. While Lilinette’s retorts were heated and annoyed, Starrk’s were half-hearted. It was amazing that the two could get along so well, but that was close to the same thing as Ichigo and Renji. They were always in each other’s face, but they had the other’s back when push came to shove.

“How long are you going to stand there?” Starrk asked, his eyes trained on you as he held the smaller girl back with one hand on her forehead. She struggled to get closer, but with his long reach and power, she failed with each attempt. “Sit,”

You smiled softly, avoiding his gaze while you took a seat on the other side of his body, facing him just as Lilinette had before she started to argue with him.

“Fine!” Lilinette scowled, sitting across from you with her arms crossed. “You better not change your mind, because I’m not sharing!”

“Wasn’t planning on it.” He mumbled, laying back down. He had to have been the laziest Espada ever.

Paying attention to Starrk, you failed to notice what Lilinette had picked up next. She shook it before setting it next to her ear. “What’s this?”

You glanced over, eyes growing wide. “Lilinette, wait – !”

But it was too late. She uncapped the bottle and it exploded in her face, covering her in the sticky substance. She blinked in surprise, a tic mark appearing on the back of her head. She growled, throwing the bottle across the clearing.

With a sigh, you removed your white button-up shirt and draped it over her head, using the sides to wipe her face off. “Honestly,” you whispered, ignoring her protests. You got the feeling that Starrk was watching you but you ignored it.

You felt a very familiar spiritual pressure and your body stiffened like a block of ice. It’d be bad if you were found with these two, but it’d probably end worse off for them.

Stark must have sensed it, too, because he stood up abruptly. “It’s time to leave, Lilinette.”

“But – !” she whined in complaint but Stark wouldn’t hear it.

“Let’s go.”

She pouted but stood and followed him. Before they could leave the clearing, you called out his name, making him turn and stare at you, his expression still blank. “Umm… will I get to see you both again?” you cursed yourself for almost slipping and asking solely about him. As much as you liked Lilinette, you couldn’t help yourself from wanting to spend one on one time with him.

He didn’t say anything, but he seemed thoughtful. Finally, he spoke the words you didn’t want to hear. “We will, on the battlefield as enemies.”

And then they disappeared.

You had already known that, but hearing those words from him… it made your heart ache in a way you didn’t know it could. You really hated this. How could someone make you feel so out of sync after less than an hour of knowing him? Well, you guessed by now it had been a little over an hour.

Caught up in your thoughts, you didn’t notice that the familiar reiatsu had finally reached you. At least not until he placed a hand on your shoulder to get your attention. Of course, he had to lean up on his tiptoes to reach that high.

“What are you doing way out here?” Toushirou questioned, glancing around at the surroundings. “You’re supposed to be on watch.”

“I, errr… I took a break, yeah, that’s it! I took a break!” you forced a grin, holding up a bag of gummy worms. You could tell by looking into his aqua-colored eyes that he didn’t believe you, that he could see through the mask you had forced up upon his arrival, and that he knew you were hiding something from him. But he didn’t question it or push it. He simply ordered you back to Urahara’s shop, lecturing you the whole way about abandoning your post without a word.

You couldn’t focus on his words, though. Your mind had strayed back to Starrk. You wanted to see him again, but you knew he was right. The only time you’d cross paths again would be on the battlefield, as _enemies_ , trying to take one another’s life.

Life could be so cruel sometimes.

“Y/N!” Toushirou hollered, several tic marks appearing on his head as he glared at you.

“Y-Yes?” you swallowed, hard. He may have been small and downright adorable, but he was _sca~ry_ when he got angry. And _boy_ did he look angry.

“Did you hear a single word I said?” He questioned, his voice labored as he tried to keep calm. Keyword: _tried_.

“Ehehe… no?”

“ **Y/N**!!”

* * *

It had been a while since the day you met Starrk and you knew you had been acting like a depressed nut job. You always thought it was so stupid when people acted like that, just to blame love for it. You thought it was stupid and sickening, yet here you were, acting the same way you swore you never would.

But you couldn’t help it. You tried your best to forget about him, but he plagued your mind day and night. You thought about him, you dreamed about him. It was _horrible_. You knew that the others were worried, but what could you do? You weren’t even fully prepared to accept being in love with him, it was just too ridiculous to believe. You were honestly so tired of it that you were tempted to ask Urahara for help. But, what could he do?

Sure, he was a freaking genius that seemed to know _everything_ , but could he really fix matters of the heart? You were pretty damn sure there was no cure for love-sickness…

You sighed, your head flat on the cold wood surface of the desk as you stared at the window. The sky was a bright, baby blue with just a few fluffy white clouds scattered about. It was the exact same as _that_ day and it filled you with a new sense of longing.

 _‘Damn bastard. The hell did I have to fall for you for?’_ And he probably had no clue. You doubt he’d feel the same, anyway. You were just a mere human and how could an all-powerful hollow, Espada or otherwise, ever fall for a mere human? Even if that human _was_ on the same length as a Shinigami. But that was besides the point. It was a matter of principle and pride!

“Y/N-chan?”

You twitched at that voice. You knew that voice. You _hated_ that voice. Don’t get me wrong. you didn’t _hate_ Orihime, per se, you just… _strongly_ dislike her. But it’s nothing personal, you just really can’t stand damsels in distress, and she’s kind of… well, she always needs saving. It pissed you off. She gives all women a bad name and makes them seem weak! Still, you didn’t want to be an ass to her, knowing how Ichigo and the others cared about her. “Yes?”

“Are you okay?” She asked, softly.

You didn’t bother looking at her. _‘Where does she get off being worried about me? We’re not even friends,’_ “Fine,”

“Really? Because the fact that you’ve sighed about a hundred times since you entered the room and class hasn’t even started yet says different.” Tatsuki commented.

Of course, your lie wasn’t very believable, but she didn’t have to shoot it down like that. “I’m perfectly fine.”

“Ugh, you’re so hopeless! Let’s go, Orihime!”

“But – ”

“She’ll be fine!”

You scoffed, glad that they had finally left you alone. You tried to close your eyes, hoping to get some sleep which you had been deprived of since _that_ day, but it didn’t work. Every time you closed your eyes, you thought of him and his stupid beautiful blue eyes. _‘Asshole,’_ “Damn it!” you slammed your forehead against the wood, harder than you meant to. This resulted in you springing back in your seat, clutching your forehead and muttering, “ow!” under your breath.

“Idiot. The hell was that for?” Ichigo asked as he took his seat in front of you.

“You’re right,” you muttered.

His body tensed as he froze, slowly turning around to look at you with wide, fearful eyes. “Did you just… _agree_ with me?” He twitched, springing up and grabbing your shoulders. “You never agree with me! Is the world ending?! Are you sick?! How long do you have to live?!”

You cocked your head to the side, staring at him like he was an idiot. Which he was, but that’s beside the point. “Ichigo?”

“Yes?!”

“Are you on crack?”

“What – Ow!!”

You glanced at Rukia, who had just kicked Ichigo in the back, thus sending him flying into the wall of the classroom, and smiled. “Thank you, Rukia~”

“Sure thing,” She grinned with pride, sitting at the desk beside Ichigo’s. “But, it _is_ a bit weird. You’ve been acting strangely for a while now,”

“Ever since she came back with Toushirou,” Ichigo commented, rubbing his back and throwing a glare at the short shinigami before retaking his seat.

“That’s **Captain Hitsugaya**.”

“Oh, hey Toushirou.”

A tic mark appeared on the small captain’s head at the blatant disrespect, but before he could act on that annoyance, his lieutenant stepped forward, instantly gaining the attention of every male in the classroom.

“Y/N-chan is in love~” She cooed, winking at you.

Each and every one of them turned to look at you, bearing mixed expressions. You groaned, sinking down in your seat, feeling your cheeks getting hot. “I am not!”

“You are too!”

“Matsumoto,” Toushirou scolded before taking his seat. “Don’t force people into believing they feel something they don’t.”

“But, Taichou~!” She whined with a pout. “Y/N _does_ feel it! She’s just in denial!”

“Denial?” Yumichika ran a hand through his hair. “Such an ugly thing.”

“Like you?” you muttered under your breath, but he heard you.

A tic mark appeared and he glared at you. “How _dare_ you! And stop laughing, Ikkaku!”

Ikkaku had fallen against the wall, his arms wrapped tight around his stomach as his obnoxious laughter filled the classroom. It was contagious, apparently, because the rest of us soon joined him, other than Toushirou – whom you’ve _never_ seen laugh – and Yumichika – who was the reason for the laughter.

It felt nice to laugh without a care in the world, but you should have known it wouldn’t last. You felt a small reiatsu, one you knew very well. It was faint and only lasted a second, but you knew it was there. And for some reason, you felt as if it were meant for you, meant to get your attention. You jumped up from your seat, ignoring the looks and calls of your friends, rushing past the teacher as she entered the room. You ignored her yells as you ran down the hall.

He was here. Starrk was here in the world of the living. Did that mean the battle was beginning? Did he have a reason for being here? You pushed your legs harder, using Shunpo to get you there as quickly as your power would allow. By the time you reached the clearing, you were out of breath and had to hunch over to regain your normal breathing pattern.

“Did you breathe at all on the way here?”

“Lilinette!” Your eyes caught hers and she grinned, clearly amused by your current state.

“Did you miss us that much?” She questioned, folding her arms over her chest and grinning smugly.

“Yeah, I did.” Why deny it? You wouldn’t admit to missing Starrk more than her, though. Your eyes looked farther across the clearing where Starrk stood, leaning against the tree with an expression that clearly said he didn’t want to be there. Your smile faltered and you quickly looked back to Lilinette. “What are you doing here?”

“That’s an easy one! See, Starrk – ”

“Lilinette!” Starrk yelled, cutting her off.

You blinked in surprise at him, that being the first time he had raised his voice. The last time they were here, no matter what she did or how much she annoyed him, he never once raised his voice, but this time was obviously different. What did Lilinette have to say that you weren’t supposed to hear? Orders from Aizen?

She pouted at him. “Fine, geez.”

You raised your eyebrow as silence fell over you. You were beginning to regret coming here. Starrk obviously wasn’t happy about it, and you knew Ichigo and the others were probably worried about the sudden exit you had taken. Maybe if you just slowly back away, you can leave without them noticing. You managed to make it one step before Lilinette caught on, turning her glare on you.

“Oh, no! You’re not going anywhere!”

“If she wants to leave, let her.”

You winced. Maybe he didn’t mean anything by it, but then… why did it hurt so bad? You decided now was as good a time as any to use your _wonderful_ lying skills that have gotten you out of quite a bit of trouble in the past. “Sorry, Lilinette. I really shouldn’t have come here, anyway. I was watching over a friend’s little sister and kinda left on short notice. I need to get back and make sure they’re okay. It was nice seeing you again, though.”

Without giving her a chance to respond, you turned on your heal and shunpo-ed away.

“Wait!” she cried, but it was lost amongst the wind rushing in your ears and the pounding of your heart in your chest.

You felt like you couldn’t breathe. You thought that, maybe, if you went to see him you’d feel better than you had this past couple of weeks. But that didn’t seem to be the case. You think it did more harm than good. _‘Thanks again, heart, you’ve screwed me over once more!’_

What were you supposed to do now? You couldn’t return to school, not like this. It’d raise even more questions that you didn’t want to answer. Couldn’t go home, since you lived with Urahara. Couldn’t go to Ichigo’s because his dad would bug the hell out of you ’til you told him what’s bothering you. There was only one place you could go; the park.

As expected, the park was nearly deserted, just a few younger kids there with their parents. You followed the path, setting yourself down on a bench in the middle of the long walkway and under the shade of a tree, where no one was around to mess with you. You slid down, your head inclined towards the sky as your arm fell over your eyes.

You realized you brought this on yourself. It was stupid of you to believe that he would have wanted to see you. You were just a human, just _trash_ , as Ulquiorra liked to say. Definitely not worth the time of a Hollow. And besides, you found it hard to believe that a Hollow could love, anyway. But… they felt other emotions, right? Well, except Ulquiorra. You found it hard to believe that he felt _anything_. The Espadas were different though.

They didn’t _just_ take on human form, but they took on human _emotion_ , too, even if they didn’t realize or understand it.

“Ahhh, but it doesn’t matter,” you sighed.

“What doesn’t matter?”

Your body tensed, _‘For the love of god, **please** tell me I imagined that’. _Carefully removing your arm, you looked at the figure standing in front of you, his face as blank as it usually was. This was just not your day. Mentally slapping yourself, you re-covered your eyes with your arm and tried not to make a big deal out of it. “It’s nothing,”

“Weren’t you supposed to go babysit?” He questioned; you could feel him watching you carefully.

You almost twitched, _‘Damn lies. Do they always have to catch up to me?’_ “They’re uh… running around playing, _or something_ …”

He raised a brow. “Is there a reason for that lie?”

This time you did twitch. “You knew from the beginning, didn’t you?”

“Yes,”

“Figures,” you paused. “Where’s Lilinette?”

“Back in the forest. She sent me after you.”

 _‘Of course, he wouldn’t have come of his own free will, idiot.’_ “Oh… right.”

Silence fell over you and you closed your eyes again, willing him to leave. You didn’t hear anything from him and assumed he had left. But, being the curious person you were, you had to check and make sure. When you removed your arm and opened your eyes, you were relieved that he wasn’t standing in front of you anymore, but when you glanced to the side, he was sitting on the bench next to you.

You jumped in surprise, nearly falling off the bench. The hell did Espada move around like cats? He glanced at you, amusement clear in his blue eyes. Still, his expression did not change. You were beginning to believe that Ulquiorra had competition.

The silence remained but you found one question, in particular, floating on your tongue. It came out before you could stop it. “I thought you said we’d see each other next on the battlefield?”

“I did,”

“You here because of Aizen again?”

“No. He doesn’t know we’re here.”

You raised an eyebrow, feeling a bit worried. Sure, he was strong, but was he strong enough to stand up to Aizen? “You sure that’s – ”

“It’s fine,” He shrugged, running a gloved hand through his hair.

“Alright then,” you muttered. “Why are you here, though?”

“If you _were_ a cat, you’d have lost about six of your lives already, you know?” He questioned, clearly avoiding the question. Why didn’t he want you to know why he was here? It didn’t have anything to do with Aizen, right? Did he have plans of his own?

“Funny. Wanna tell me why you’re avoiding that question?”

“Seven lives,”

“Starrk,” you scowled at him, falling back against the bench. Were all Espada this difficult? Wait, you already knew the answer to that.

Starrk didn’t respond. He just closed his eyes and rested his cheek on his fist. With a sigh, you moved your gaze to the sky. Birds chirped above you as they made their way through the sky, bouncing from tree to tree as they chased each other. The wind blew your hair and rustled the bright green leaves on the trees. A few children could be heard in the distance, laughing as they played with their parents and friends. It was a beautiful day, one that should be enjoyed. The kind of day that you don’t expect anything to go wrong on. The sun was hidden behind a soft gray cloud and the day was cool. Not cold, but not hot, either. It was perfect.

But you couldn’t bring yourself to fully admire it. Your thoughts were too focused on the male sitting beside you.

Starrk stood up suddenly, startling you from your thoughts. He moved to stand directly in front of you, his eyes locked on your own. You couldn’t look away, even if you wanted to. Which you didn’t. “You still want to know why we came back?”

“Of course,”

“Because of **you** ,”

“Me?” you blinked, pointing your index finger at yourself.

He nodded, moving his gaze to the sky above. “Since I can remember, I’ve always been alone. Because of how strong I was, no other hollow could stand to be around me. They always died because they weren’t strong enough to handle my power. I’m not sure when it happened, but because of that loneliness, my soul was split into two.”

“And Lilinette is the second half?” you guessed.

He nodded again. “I’m not even sure which of us was the original. But we were together to stop the loneliness that we felt. I still feel it, but it’s not as strong as it used to be, thanks to Lilinette. I joined Aizen because he made me believe that I could be around people without them dying. They were strong enough to be around me, but I was still lonely.” His eyes closed for a minute before reopening, this time locked with your own, his voice barely above a whisper. “You take that away, completely. I don’t feel lonely around you, and neither does Lilinette.”

You had no clue what to say. You had never been in a position like that before. Whenever Matsumoto would question you about it, you’d always reply, _‘I’ll cross that bridge when and if I come to it’_ , and now that you were at that bridge, you had no idea how to get across. You looked away from him, tugging at the collar of your shirt as your face started to heat up. You cursed yourself for that. _‘Like a blushing schoolgirl, I swear’,_

“You’re strong,” He stated.

You knew what he meant. You were strong enough to be around him without having to worry about his power destroying you. Did that mean he wanted to stay? “Starrk?”

“Hm?”

“Do you know what love is?”

His brow shot up in confusion. “No,”

You stood up, unable to believe what you were about to do. You got closer to him, staring into his eyes. “Then let me show you,” you grabbed the back of his head, forcing his lips down onto your own. You wanted to convey everything you felt and Matsumoto always told you that the best way to do that was through a kiss. She always said that when you kiss someone, that person can feel everything you felt, and you were hoping she was right.

Starrk relaxed, his hands gripping your waist and pulling you closer to his body. You felt it. That level of happiness that people say you can only feel when you’re in love. You could feel it so clearly and, suddenly, all that crap about love didn’t seem so stupid anymore.

You pulled back, smiling up at him. “I love you Starrk and I… I don’t ever want to be apart from you.”

His lips twitched up into a smile and his grip tightened. “You won’t have to be,”

“You’re not alone anymore.” you murmured, kissing him again. He responded instantly, his grip tightening. “Will you stay with me?”

“Yes, I will.”

“Finally! I told you she’d want you, Starrk!” The two of you pulled apart to look at the grinning blonde, who looked extremely proud of herself. “You should be thanking me! If I hadn’t pushed him into coming here, there’s no way he would of!”

You laughed, placing your hand on top of her head. “And how would you like me to repay you?”

She grinned. “I want more human food! The same as last time!”

You smiled as Starrk came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder.

Matsumoto had been right about everything. You were happy and you knew these memories would last you a lifetime.

**~Fin~**

“Wait, wait, wait.” you pushed the _Fin_ sign out of the way before returning to Starrk’s side. “I have another question.”

“Of course you do.” He grinned softly. “Eight lives.”

“What number are you?”

“You don’t know?” He blinked. You shook your head and he sighed, removing the white glove from his left hand to reveal a big, bold **1** in black. “I’m the Primera,”

“Holy shit. Never would have guessed that one.”

“See? Even Y/N thinks you don’t act very Primera-like!”

“Oi, I never said that!”

“But that’s what you meant!”

“No, it’s not!”

Starrk sighed as he watched the two of you, a smile tugging at his lips. He really wasn’t alone anymore.

* * *


End file.
